Untitled.

I thought the mind would tend to the heart
and set it straight in time.

Time heals all wounds I thought
How could I have been so wrong?

(I thought I could never be)

This wretched heart deceives me.
It hides behind a fog of lies
And tells me she's fine, that all is well
"I'm over him. I'm moving on"

(More lies)

She is the queen of excuses, this one
Though he won't ever come 'round
She waits.
And refuses to let go...

It Rains, She Pours

Storm clouds loom
Her heart is broken
Her confidence, shaken

Tears rain from her soul
She is broken
And she is shaking

They have seen, how did they know?
How could these walls have broken?
This facade ripped and taken?

Oh heavens above, rain down on me
Pour over with grace and mercy
Wash me clean, wash me anew

Help me, Lord, I am so broken.

At First You See But a Poor Reflection

This skin, a thin veil of armor
Emotions flow like stormy seas
Rushing,
breaking the surface
Til I am but a poor reflection of what I thought I knew

A parched desert rose
Longing for fountains to pour
Searching for an oasis
She aches for clear waters
to see even her ragged reflection would mean life again

Voiceless, a mute lark longs for freedom
Her cries fall on deaf ears
Locked in her cage, her only solace
But the walls will echo the gentle whisper
A reflection of hope and saving grace

Now we see but a poor reflection
Then we shall see
Unveiled
Refreshed
Singing once more

We will be free

We will be free

Diving in...

One step away from the light
cold hands hesitantly reaching out

Fingers exposed now
the warmth of its rays shocks my senses
I retract
Pull in...
Hide in my shell -
this comfortable and predictable place of mine.

I'll take a break...
let the shock and adrenaline subside...
and once again
these hands will pull away from this form
and out towards His.

Slowly.

Breathing in...

and out...

and in again...

til I find the courage to just do it...

to jump in

Let the light like a cool rain

Shock my senses til I'm awake again

Happy Birthday to You

July 17th.
I was reminded of you today.
And then a pang of pain resounded in my heart
The patch ripping open for a chance moment
As I thought of you

Where are you now? I wonder

3 years and counting...
But what does it matter?
You are not who I thought you were
You never were
Could you ever be?

But for today
I wish you well
Good tidings
Health and happiness
from the ones you left behind

Happy Birthday

Over Yonder Hill (A new day awaits)

Slowly, I take in the surroundings.

Breathe in the air.

Breathe out the anxiety



Is it the right thing to do?



In the quiet of sunset,

with the gentle breeze blowing,

the trees wave their farewells.

And I prepare.

My mind

My heart

My hopes

My nerves

For what lies ahead

.

This is the right thing to do.

I'm sure of it

In (my) Haze

i dreamed of you
in my slumber
my heart traced your form
and i ached for you
from the deepest parts of my soul
and it scared me to think
that someone
whomever,
wherever,
whenever you are
could touch me
could reach into me so

you hold the key
to release this dormant love
you alone see the map
of intricate routes to this void
you hold the key
to the door of my life
the traces of your footprints
the path to freedom
mere outlines in the sand
that finally
bring this vagabond home
.

i want to leave the things familiar
detour from this ordinary life
touch the ground that's off the beaten path
discover my maker's route

let go of this map of my own creation
follow blindly where he leads
see the world through his eyes
and remove the scales placed
by my own expectations

take off this yoke of my own doing
don those heavenly wings
to soar and rise to new heights
heights that i've never seen

release me now from this leash
this tether placed by duty
unlock the door
and let the light shine through
even if it threatens to blind me

i long for heavenly things
those mysteriously divine muses
which words cannot fully contain
nor imagination encompass completely

sing to me your celestial songs
stir in me your haunting prose
speak oh voice of majesty
tell me your story once more

let your words rip through me
tear me apart with your grace
crack this thick, calloused skin
and seep into me deeply

piece me together as you will
and though you know i'll fight it
rewrap this package
cover it with your grace

let me ne'er forget
that your hand has always been nigh
pushing and prodding
leading me to this path i've yet to see

oh beacon of hope
oh hope of glory and life
lead me on
and guide me through your unfamiliar